Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Hypochondria, Indeed...

Took Monster to the vet today. Nothing wrong with him. Of course.

In fact, he was so healthy they didn't even bother sedating him to examine him further. In the vet's opinion Monster's in great health, albeit very skinny, but has a behavior issue. Yeah, knew the last two points already.

The exam was awful. Monster did well (for him) initially, but when he was taken into a corridor so the vet could watch him move it all started going south. There were people passing, some were carrying things, dogs were barking behind doors, he had to stand and be poked and prodded in all this, and he couldn't take it for very long. He started lunging and growling, both trying to get away and scare people off. He managed to jump up at one vet tech who was passing when I didn't see her, and put his feet on her chest and stick his nose in her face... He was muzzled, and quiet, but it was of course terrifying for her nonetheless.

That was a difficult place to be. I hadn't expected we'd be forced to stand for an examination in the middle of a busy (and narrow) corridor, with people coming from both directions and turning up from behind... And all for nothing, as the vet determined there was nothing wrong with him after all. It wasn't a surprise, I've been debating whether or not to have him looked at for ages now because a large part of me was convinced he's fine. But hearing it felt awful. Not because I was in any way disappointed that he's healthy, but because it means I've put myself, the veterinary staff, and most of all Monster through an awful ordeal for nothing. I'm ashamed and sad, and I actually started crying when she told me. Which made me embarrassed, which is not the best emotion to have when you're trying to stop crying...

Still, it's over now. We're back home, nothing really bad happened, and Monster is resting. I'll let myself wallow for today, but tomorrow I have to let this go. It is good that Monster is fine! I'm just upset that I went chasing wild geese at his expense.

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